God ALWAYS has a purpose...

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your
own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6


God always has a purpose.

this is a sentence i know i have seen time and time again in my life before.
but sitting in church on sunday morning, it really hit me...
God ALWAYS has a purpose.


as i've gotten older, i have come to realize just how amazing his purpose is.
he always hears my prayers, but doesn't always answer them the way i think He will.

i know there have been so many times in my life i have been thankful that He didn't give me what i thought i needed at the moment, after seeing He had something greater planned for me down the road.


with that being said,
at this point (and i can't say for certain)...
but, i am pretty sure God is having "a bigger plan" in the works.

when we first entered levi at tabernacle,
we truly thought this was God's plan.
and when i started my mary kay business,
it seemed even more clear that He provided the way to pay for the tab for all of our children.

so, i was a bit confused when the talk of homeschool kept coming around.
because...
in my mind, His purpose had already shown to light.

in fact, i knew it had...
so, i didn't know why in my private thoughts, it would randomly pop into my head.
yet still in my uncertainty, i wore a disguise and would quickly bypass the "talk" of homeschool any time anyone brought it up.

and then one day on a hour long car ride...
i asked the question...
the one that was really in the back of my head for a couple years at least.

"can you tell me about this homeschool thing, orenda?"

i think i truly thought she would shed some light on the topic, and that it would finally reassure in my head
"the plan of tabernacle".

but, once again to my amazement.
the opposite of what i thought was going to happen happened.

every question and fear of what i had been hesitant about was answered without my even asking.
and by the end of the drive home,
i honestly think my mind was made up.

i came home, walked in the door...
looked into brian's eyes, and once again, told him my heart.
on the surface, i really thought he would laugh at the idea.
but i think i knew before a word was ever even spoken,
just what his desire was.

and within 10 minutes, we realized we were on the same page.
homeschool...
was a good choice for our family, our goals, and our life.


a part of me is excited, i can't deny that.
excited to see what God has in store with this opportunity.
and to see how this experience draws us closer as a family, and closer to Him.

yet, even as i write this the thought of it kinda makes my stomach hurt.
i am full of fear, not really knowing fully what to expect.
but, as of today...
the choice is made up. and our children will be homeschooled through "providence community school"
home 3 days a week, school 2 days a week.

and in the back of my head i know,
i have always drawn closer to God through my fears,
and as always, i rest assure in knowing...
He ALWAYS has a purpose!

decisions...

becoming a parent has made me more of a thinker. i really do try and take the time needed to see how the things i do are going to directly affect the well being of my children before coming to any conclusions (like any parent, i'm sure). something i started practicing when levi was born, but even more so the last few months now that i see that the majority of circumstances that come up in my life are now able to be understood by my children, and that they learn through my actions.
my mind has been like a little seesaw the past couple months concerning my pediatrician. fethermans office is amazing. and as far as knowledge goes, he is voted the #1 office in sarasota. seriously, i have never meet anyone in the medical field around here who doesn't know who featherman is. he has been there through some rough times with my children and has seen me though a lot. despite how amazing he is as a person and as an individual doctor. i have been feeling, for a while now, that he is maybe getting to big for his practice. talking to other mothers i have been hearing story after story of similar situations just like my last experience with him and his staff. monday was my last straw. i learned that he has now changed practice policies. if you call, even to make a sick visit to his office and have to leave a message, they no longer have to call you back the same day. they have given themselves a 24 hour call back time.
so, i made the decision.....
it is now time to say "goodbye" to dr. fetherman. i was somewhat saddened when i called to make the consultation with dr. sutherland. but meeting her today has really opened my eyes. she seems so knowledgeable and kind hearted. one of the first things she said (not even knowing at that point who i was coming from), that she intends on being a somewhat small practice. she really feels it is her job to "know" you and your family. she wants to be sure when you call that she knows exactly who you and your children are and doesn't need to pull out your file to remember. i immediately felt a comfort with her that i can't even describe. i went in thinking it was only going to be a "meeting" .... that i wouldn't be making any rash decisions. but by the end i just felt such a peace that this is were my children now need to be. i signed the release form and my children are now officially patients of dr. sutherland. i made nataleys 6 month appointment, and ironically it is the same day and time that her appointment was scheduled over at fethermans. i will admit i do not like confrontation so i am a little nervous to call and cancel all up coming appointments my children have.... such is life i suppose.

a quick note of something i found sweet....
my parents watched my kids today during the consultation. and when i got home my dad was sitting with nataley in his arms on the recliner watching "beauty and the beast" with alivia. my mother was very much ready to go when i got back.... she had to get home to her dog! :P
anyway, my dad was really into the movie and wouldn't let them leave till it was over. he even made a comment at the end...
"thats good, he doesn't have to be a beast anymore". it made me smile.

changes/ well baby visit

BIG changes in our home today, big changes!
the beginning of the day was a bit of a challenge, nataley had a well check up at 8:45am and the kids had to be at school at 8:30. i was silently planning on brian to help me in one of the two areas, but anyone who knows our family well enough would know that this was a silly thing for me to do the week before thanksgiving. he had to be up and out the door early and couldn't do anything about it. so, there i was at 11:30 last night gathering all the things up i would need in the morning to get 3 children up, fed and out the door by 7:45am. thankfully, everything went rather smoothly, and there was enough time for levi to be his lagging little self as we walked into school.






i don't know what it is about my little nataley that makes me so happy to take her out. people always point out babies, cause come on, they are ALL so darn cute! but with nat ( i am trying out different nick names for this child to see what feels right, currently she is nat) everyone always stops me to tell me how bubbly and happy she is. it was no different at dr. fethermans office today. all the nurses and receptionists were in awe of just how easy it is to crack this little girl up, i really love it and the attention that goes along with it (maybe kinda weird of me but true none the less). anyway, she passed with flying colors, and is now ready to start some foods! so yea! we get to start that road again :)

Nataley Faye:
4 months old
weight: 13lbs 11oz
height: 24 1/4"
head circumference: 15 3/4"

looking back on levi and alivias charts nataley is still the largest at this point, so maybe she will actually be a taller one?
the only thing that left me thinking as i drove home was a remark from a nurse who was a little surprised that we don't have her in a crib in her own room yet. i have always been late to do that with the kids. call it laziness on my part, cause that is probably what it is. it just is easier in the middle of the night, cause lets face it, i don't handle little sleep well.
but i did get to thinking that maybe this lady was actually right and decided that after i got the kids from school i would head on down to baby world and get alivia a toddler bed and let the girls have their first official night in "the girls room"!





now its 9:06... and all is quiet and still, and went just like every other night in our house (except different beds)....
let just hope and pray it remains that way throughout the night tonight! ;)